Broken and Beautiful

Both/and
Broken and beautiful
Life is complex, spectacular, horrifying, scary, ugly, absolutely breath taking, heart warming, loving, hateful, wicked, amazing, inspiring, terrible, painful, completely astonishing, miraculous, evil, surprising, staggering, incredible.

I weep for the 32 plus 1
I wail for the 3000 + of 911
I sob even harder for the tens of thousands more dying in war
All forms of human atrocity
Spewed out daily on the radio

Should I retreat in respite from the agony?
Should I flee into my own safe world?

Only my world is no more protected
It knows the deepest of grief
I’ve known for 5 years now, what the parents of Virginia Tech
are just now discovering

Where then do I escape?
When my private experience mirrors the suffering of the world-
The deepest of losses
The most extreme of betrayals
Where is my innocence to be found?
How do I live the legacy?

It comes back again and again to this moment
The simple pleasure of touch
The uplift of sunrise
The connection to spirit
and love of friends.

Yes I will keep breathing in the pain
and breathing out compassion
I will not apologize for that again
I will acknowledge the suffering
but enjoy the moment.
This is who I am
This is how I heal
This is my journey
In this broken and beautiful world

Written in memory to the 32 people who lost their lives in
senseless violence on April 16, 2007 while trying to better themselves and the world.
©Elene Bratton April 19, 2007